63.1 & 63.2
Julianne stared at the clouds outside of the airplane window, wondering how anything could look so unmistakably solid, seem so undeniably present, and still be like nothing at all. She was growing tired of illusions. Was anything ever simple in this world of smoke and mirrors? Or was it all just a matter of finding peace amidst the doubt.

"You seem pensive."

Julianne turned her attention away from the window and gazed into curious hazel eyes. "Did you have a nice nap?" she asked.

Kris nodded and let out a yawn. "I didn't get much sleep last night. Traveling jitters, I guess." She glanced around the jet. "It's kind of weird not flying with hundreds of other people."

"Would it make you feel better if I sat behind you and kicked your chair?" Julianne wondered. "I don't want to rob you of the experience."

"Maybe on the flight back," Kris replied in mock seriousness. "I wouldn't want you to go out of your way for my convenience."

Julianne grinned, and relaxed into the seat. In spite of all of the mixed emotions regarding her friendship with Kris, she was content at that moment. And maybe that was all that mattered in the end.

"So what were you thinking?" Kris asked suddenly. "When you were staring out of the window."

The question caught Julianne off-guard, and she struggled to find a quick way to get out of answering. But it was stupid, she realized, to edit herself so frequently. Did she really need to paint a perfect portrait of herself for Kris' benefit? If her feelings for this woman were real, then why couldn't she just be honest? "Um," she said, looking out of the airplane window again, as if the answers were floating alongside the airplane. "I was just watching the clouds. Thinking that they're deceptive."

Kris watched her carefully, her gaze drifting to the window then back again to Julianne's eyes. "Why deceptive?"

Julianne felt incredibly ridiculous admitting her meandering thoughts. She instantly regretted having gone with the truth. It made her feel vulnerable. "I was just being silly," she answered, hoping it was enough to deter the topic. "Are you thirsty?" she added.

"No," Kris responded. She glanced out of the window again. "Why deceptive?" she asked again.

The actress sighed quietly, then gave up trying to avoid the question. "Switch seats with me," she said suddenly.

"What?"

"Switch," Julianne said again. "If I'm going to explain then you need a better view."

Kris seemed confused but switched seats with Julianne without further question. Once she was settled in the window seat, she glanced expectantly at the world outside. "What am I looking at?"

"I don't know. What do you see?"

"Clouds," Kris answered automatically, looking back at Julianne. "Will the questions get harder as we go along?"

Julianne smiled. "What do they look like? And if you say 'clouds' I'm going to tickle you mercilessly when we get to California."

A raised eyebrow was Kris' response, before turning back to the window. "Was that a threat, Miss Franqui?"

"Maybe."

Kris smiled, but didn't reply. Instead, she took a deep breath and focused on trying to decipher what Julianne was trying to get her to see. "They remind me of cotton candy," she said finally.

"Why cotton candy?" Julianne wondered.

"Just the texture. They look soft."

"And edible?" Julianne teased.

Kris laughed. "You're not answering my original question."

"Why are clouds deceptive?" Julianne shrugged and nodded to the window. "I invite you to try and test your cotton candy theory."

Kris thought about it for a moment and smiled. "I see. But why is that important?"

"What?"

"Why is their not being what they appear to be important to you?"

Julianne realized that was Kris' real question, and that was a harder one to explain. Or maybe not. Maybe nothing was ever really hard to explain unless you wanted to skid around the truth. "Because nothing ever is," she told her.

"Important?"

"No, what it appears to be."

Kris considered that. "Maybe you just have to look closer."



******


"Oh, my God, this is beautiful," Kris breathed, as she stepped inside Julianne's house. Her gaze immediately flew to the glass windows across from her. She could almost see the ocean from where she was standing. She tore her eyes from the view and looked around. Everything was so … bright.

It was strange to look outside and see endlessness, instead of the usual shadows cast by buildings overhead. It made her feel like she was standing in the foyer of a palace. Or at least something out of an episode of MTV Cribs.

"You like?" Julianne asked, looking around. "It's not much."

At first, Kris thought that Julianne was being sarcastic, but then realized she wasn't. Julianne actually sounded unsure, self-conscious even. She glanced around again, amazed that two people could look at the same thing and see something totally different. "Well, I'm a little disappointed that the walls aren't lined with diamonds. And I suppose gold-trimmed tiles wouldn't hurt either."

"Your sarcasm is duly noted, Miss Milano," Julianne replied. "May I show you to your quarters?"

Kris gasped in mock surprise. "There's no butler?"

Julianne rolled her eyes and started walking.

"How about a maid?" Kris continued, following her hostess toward the living room. She paused to look at the view a little closer. The beach was right below. "This is like a dream house. I can't believe you live here."

Julianne turned around and glanced at Kris seriously. "You can stay here whenever you want, for as long as you'd like. Even if I'm not here."

Kris looked at the actress and smiled. "What fun would that be?" she asked. "But thanks." She followed Julianne to the guest bedroom and dropped down her stuff. "It has a balcony?" Kris walked across the room and slid open the glass doors that led to the small balcony. Warm, salty air instantly brushed against her face as she stepped outside. She stared at the view of the ocean ahead. "I'm marrying your house."

"You could just as easily marry me," Julianne replied. "I promise the sex would be better."

Kris' heart leapt up her throat. She could feel her entire body responding to those words. She's kidding. Laugh. She laughed, trying not to sound as nervous as she felt. What do I say to that?!

Thankfully, Julianne changed the subject. "I'll let you get settled. Come find me when you've gotten bored of the view."

"That might be never," Kris answered, with a slight smile. She wasn't kidding either. She could easily stare at the ocean forever.

"Then I'll find you, when I get bored of waiting." Julianne winked and walked away, leaving Kris alone with the Pacific Ocean.

Kris smiled and leaned against the railing, feeling the breeze in her hair. She willed herself not to think about anything; not the way that Julianne looked when she smiled or moved or breathed. Or the way her voice sounded when she talked or laughed or whispered. Kris didn't want to think about the way her body tingled when Julianne's was near, even when they weren't even touching.

Kris wanted, merely, to exist, peacefully, at that moment, without the complications of emotions, and strange body responses. Marry her? Better sex? Jesus. She's trying to kill me.

She stared at the water for a few minutes longer, then went back into the room. She hadn't really noticed it before, having been distracted by the balcony. The walls were a light shade of blue, with framed black and white photographs of unfamiliar landscapes lined across them. There was a double bed, neatly made, and a dresser with a mirror. Kris wondered how many guests Julianne usually had. She couldn't imagine that there would be many.

Kris took a deep breath and sat at the end of the bed, debating on whether to unpack or meet back up with Julianne. It was silly that she was already missing the actress when they hadn't been apart for more than fifteen minutes. For the sake of stubbornness, she decided to unpack. She was sure that Julianne wanted some time to settle in.